Current mood:

grateful

Updates on my life
Well it has been a while since ive updated journal. So here goes..

Alot of changes have hit me this year. I guess 2007 has been my year. Again I have learnt alot about where your true friends lie.
There are two types of friends out there, theres the friends that stab you in the back or the friends that stab you in the front. Seems alot of them turned out to stab me in the back.

All my life I have been surrounded by a different range of friends, the ones who would admire you one day and hate you another, then the friends who just were so wild and crazy that they cried out for attention, and of course I cant forget the friends who would always call me to come out for drinks and clubbing. Sorry guys, I got over all of that.
This year, 2007, I have reunited with a different sort of friends. Ones who understand where im coming from and will not criticize my time spent with them. Ive realized, learning from these people, that there are actually people out there who would rather sit and catch up, than go out and get pissed and not remember the last thing said to each other. This guys, is not my life. I'd rather make the most of my future than to waste it on drugs, alcohol, one night stands, being a kid at still the age of 20-25. Its sad to think that these particular people think they're adults.

This year must have been an awakening year for me. I had met a lifelong partner last year and so suddenly when I did, thats when I had lost alot of my friends respect. This never made sense to me and nor did I bother to sit down once and wonder why they were acting like this. Not happy for me or thankful that im finally happy. Instead they only focused on themselves about 'theyre' needs and wants in our friendships. Oh and the fact that I never saw them much anymore.. sorry but as you once said. It takes two to tango :)
I have wasted so many years of just giving two shits about how other people feel and tippy toeing around other peoples standard lives and ive always been shut out of their outings and mostly been a third wheel. Well this time im one to be greedy and enjoy the happiness around me.

I couldn't care less who talks about me, I couldn't care less who remains my friend or not, I couldn't care less that you guys have deleted me out of your life. Its really sweet to know how much I am center of your attention. Its interesting to see the constant backstabbing and dirty looks are still happening around me and in all honestly, the more it happens the more it shows how grown up you's turned out to be in the end. I just know deep inside that I have benefited for standing up for myself and cleaning out my dirty closet and no more will I feel an outsider or you guys make me feel bad for my happiness.

Hopefully one day soon, you will understand the place im in. And know true happiness doesn't sit at the bottom of a bottle of bourbon, or a bag full of pills and inside a pub full of single sleazy people.

Well aside from that, everything else this year has been going fantastically. Incase you's havent heard.. I have now officially become a full time worker! After so many years of me studying and holding myself back for so many appointments and peer pressure I now currently work as a Business Deliver at the Taxation Department inside the World Trade Center in the city which is practically down the road from me and Daniels apartment. Which is really close to St Kilda, Chapel St and the city of course. Were still finding our feet while living together but I guess it must be true! you really dont know someone until you live with them, I definitely know Daniel alot better now since living with him for over a month now. And I could only feel stronger and love him more and more each day since feeling more connected to him. Im now impatient to marry! I don't want to wait! hehe. But time will tell the day when we decide we cant wait any longer to enjoy our lives together as a married couple. We may be young but far out, everything is alike between us.. the way we think.. the way we speak.. our interests and dis interests.. (except for the fact hes a Pantera fan and im a NFG fan which NFG would kick Pantera's ass any day ;) ha ha yes dreamer) I have never shared this much chemistry with someone before and felt so intimate with Daniel. All these years of boyfriends and heartbreaks and Mehs and disappointments coming from them has happened for a reason.. for me to meet somebody like Daniel so he would make it all better for me again. He stitched up my heart, made it beat again and shined the light inside my dark room I have hidden in all these years.

Everyone speaks about finding theyre soul mate.. I have finally found mine.

Anyway Daniel is suffocating me with his love so were off to get chinese and have a Sex and the City marathorn night ha ha..